117. Your References Are More Than References: How to Build a Job Search Support Team

In this episode of Her Next Chapters, we continue the job search series by talking about a commonly overlooked strategy: gathering references at the beginning of your job search — not the end.

Most people wait until a final interview or job offer to think about references. But what if your references became part of your job search support team from the start?

Christina shares:
→ why references are about more than checking a box for employers
→ how reconnecting with former colleagues can activate your network
→ why relationship-building matters more than simply applying online
→ how to approach former managers, peers, and direct reports
→ tips for creating a professional reference list document
→ a personal story about asking for references after a 13-year career break

This episode is especially helpful for women navigating career transitions, returning to work, or rebuilding professional confidence in midlife.

If you’ve been relying only on online applications, this conversation will help you think differently about networking, visibility, and human connection during your job search.

Christina also shares a free Reference List Template you can use during your job search. To get a copy, email Christina at Christina@HerNextChapters.com.

Free Resource

Grab the Strengths-First Resume Template - ideal for career transitions, whether you’re returning after a break, navigating a layoff, pivoting roles, or ready for a change.

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Email me directly at christina@hernextchapters.com

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Transcript

Job Search Series Recap

Christina Kohl 0:00

Hi everyone, and welcome to this week's episode of Her Next Chapters. If you've been following along, we are in the midst of a job search series. We started a few weeks ago with the first episode around your resume being a marketing document, not a historical document. And then we moved on to talk about clarity and how that is foundational to your job search and that if you have a general resume and a general approach, you're not going to be getting callbacks for interviews. You need to be targeted and specific in what type of role you want next. And that's what's going to make you stand out and see of resumes. And last week we talked about going above and beyond the online application process. HR leaders are telling job applicants they want to see an email from you. Reach out to them directly. You're going to find them on LinkedIn, you can look on the company's website, do a little bit of research, and that's the whole point. Most people won't do that, and they'll click the easy online apply button and just sit and wait and hope. So go back and listen to that episode if you missed it. There's some great tips on how to go above and beyond the ATS, the applicant tracking system. And today we're going to talk a little bit about networking, but more specifically about getting references. Most people wait till the end of a job search to gather their references because, oh my gosh, I've made it through the final rounds of interviews. They're going to be asking for references. My advice is contrary to that. My advice is that you start at the beginning by asking for references. And what I mean by this is you would cast a wide net. You reach out to your network, whether that's whether that's a past colleague, a vendor that you've worked with, someone from school, maybe, you know, depending on how far you are into your career, if you if you've done a certification program recently. What you're doing is you're looking for people that can be on your job search team, which is why we want to tap them early in the process, not at the very end. Imagine this, you've gone through, you've you've had that final interview, an offer is coming, and we need your list of references. And you're like, oh my gosh, I haven't talked to these people in a year. They don't even know I'm looking. So you don't want to be scrambling at the last minute, right? That's obviously a reason to have your references up front and ready. But also, if they are on your job search team, you are activating your network. Most employers, if they're doing reference checks, they might be asking for maybe three, maybe all the way up to five people that to give as references. And as an HR professional, that's what I've done. I've I've called and I I talked to people about my final candidate just to kind of make sure that they are who they say they are, right? It's just kind of a it's a reference check, it's a character check. And obviously people are only going to put down people a reference of someone who's gonna say something good about you, but you want to reach out to them early. You again, you might only need three to five, but I encourage you to get a long list of references, maybe ten, you know, depending on where you are in your career and and reaching out to people. But you know, if you have a goal of ten, when the uh time actually comes, you can hand over the three names that make the most sense for that particular role. But in the meantime, you've had 10 people who are on your job search team. You've reached out with them, you've connected with them, asking them to be a reference, you let them know about your job search. You've probably provided them a copy of your resume, um, gotten some feedback. And if they know of a position, they hear of a position, they're gonna think of you, right? Because they're one of your references. So you're letting your people know that you are in the market and what specifically you're looking for. I would encourage you as you're reaching out to your network to have these conversations, to let them actually be conversations. So obviously you can message someone on LinkedIn and maybe you haven't talked for five years or something. Totally fine. That's what LinkedIn is for. It makes it easier to find people. And you can, you know, send them a message or a connection request and a little note. You get at least five of those free each month if you're not paying for LinkedIn, or maybe pay for a month if you're doing a lot of activity. But reach out and just a simple note, like, hey, how have you been? It's been a while since we've worked together. And I was just thinking about you the other day and wanted to connect. Not everybody's active on LinkedIn, so don't don't put any worries into it if they don't get back to you right away. That's all right. That's why you want to be doing this in advance, not at the last minute when you need the reference. And so, you know, reach out to them there. Ideally, as part of the conversation, you schedule a 15-minute call to check in, you know, a quick coffee chat, or if there's someone local, you know, and depending on how close you are to them, try to get on the phone or in person with them to have the conversation and get their insights on what they think about your resume, what they think about your career goals, what they think your strengths are, what advice they have for you. No, be to be clear, you're not asking them for a job, but by inviting them to be a reference for you, you are putting them on your job search team, right? So again, I would encourage you to have maybe 10, at least five, because some employers do ask for that many. Um, three is kind of more than norm. And then once you have their permission, then, oh yeah, I'd be happy to be a reference for you. And I mean, really, is anyone ever gonna say no to that? The only time I had someone question it, this is when I had been a longtime stay-at-home mom. I was out of the workforce for 13 years, and I went and found the executive director of the place that I worked at a couple years before I left the workforce. So it had been 15 years since he and I had worked together. Reached out to him on LinkedIn, sent a private message, you know, hey Chris, how are how are Cindy and the kids? I'm sure the kids are all grown up by now. We'd love to connect with you here. Um, and so of course he came back and asked me, like, hey, Gola, what's going on with you? And I, you know, tell him, you know, I've been a stay-at-home mom, but I'm excited to go back to the workforce. And actually, I have a favor to ask. I would really appreciate it if you could be a reference for me. So honestly, he hesitated a little because it had been 15 years since we worked together. And he called that out. And I told him, I said, you know what, Chris? I've been essentially unemployed for 13 years. So I would really appreciate it if you would do it. And here's a letter of recommendation that you wrote for me when I left the organization 15 years ago to refresh your mind. So he, of course, gladly um accepted my invitation to be on my job search team as a reference and did serve very well as a reference for me. So, you know, that's that's my encouragement for you. And then the other part of it is to create a reference list document that you can send to an employer. And actually, I have a template you can use for this. If that's something of interest to you, just send me an email. I'll be happy to send it to you. So my email is Christina at her next chapters.com. The template is in a nice, pretty format, and all you have to do is populate it with your references. That way, when you get the job interview that asks you at the end of the interview, you know, we we're considering offering you a job, but we'd like to check your references, you'll have that ready. And you're gonna want to include, you know, their contact information. So you've already checked with everyone on your reference list. What is the best way for someone to contact you? And then you will also want to include in there how you know this person. Um, it's not just like their name and phone number. It's also like the context of, you know, worked together um for three years at this organization as my um as my direct report. So I want you to be thinking about that too. You don't just have to go to your managers in the past. You could um uh I would encourage you to have at least one person on your reference list be someone who you reported to, but it's okay to have a peer, someone who works side by side with you. It's also okay to have someone who was a direct report of yours, um, because they're gonna speak to things differently about their work experience with you. And again, the reference list is not just the list to hand over to an employer, it's you know, reconnecting with people that maybe you haven't been in touch with and having more purpose. And after you have that conversation, and whether I mean hopefully it's a verbal conversation, but even if it's just uh, you know, a written text or email or LinkedIn messaging, um, is that you now have a reason to keep in touch with them. Right? It's not just one conversation and then wait until the interview comes that the or the job offer is coming and they want your references. It's also keeping giving you a reason to touch base. And it might be like, oh my gosh, I just applied for this job and they did ask for my references up front. I don't know if it's gonna go anywhere, but I just want to let you know, right? So you've got other people that you're communicating with, you know, and then if there's a job that you're interested in and someone in your reference list team knows somebody who works there, then oh my gosh, how great is that? You can go and ask them for that introduction. Okay. So you want to keep them, you know, you don't want to bombard them like daily, like, hey, I just apply for this job and this job, you know, you don't want to be a pest. But once a month, maybe every six weeks, giving them an update, like, hey, I've I'm still, you know, in the looking for roles. These are a couple of places that I've applied to lately, or just kind of depending on the relationship, but keep them updated. And again, it gives you a reason to keep in touch, even if it's just sharing your excitement that you've been invited back for a second round interview. Um, fingers crossed, send me good wishes, you know, that type of thing. Um, let them be your cheer team, your support team. Okay. So that is why I recommend having a reference list up front at the beginning of your job search. Don't wait till the end. And I again, if you want to get a copy of my template, it's all pretty and formatted, and you would just fill it in with your your people's information, email me at Christina at her nextchapters.com and I will send it over to you. All right, we will continue the job search series for another few weeks. Um, honestly, I don't have it all mapped out. I'm kind of just going off of like conversations I've been having with people for my ideas and inspiration. So if there is a particular topic that you would like me to focus on during the job search series, same thing. Send me an email and give me questions you have or what topics you really wish I would cover. Um, I'm going to be doing this series for a few more weeks. So send me those ideas so I can make sure to um to answer your questions and present you what is useful. All right, well, that's it for this week, my friends. Have a great week and we'll chat with you next time. Thank you so much for listening today. I hope this episode hit home for you. And if you haven't already, be sure to connect with me on LinkedIn and say hello. I can hardly thank you for listening. Until next time, remember your story and your next chapter already to begin.